The countdown begins for a time of the year that, whether parents like it or not, is hugely special for children. Even little Christmas adults like me end up excited when we have small children, because they convey their joy and enthusiasm. But not everything is good at Christmas, so, just as we advise you about shopping, here they go my christmas tips so that these parties are all the good things children deserve.
Not that I am a grinch mom, not exactly. But there are things that I find unbearable and too common at Christmas, and that have made me have a bad time in the past. The worst of them is the usual emotional blackmail to which children are subjected by adults.
My first Christmas advice It is an emotional anti-blackmail shield. Remember to repeat this phrase in all the necessary situations: “All children are good”. I tell you below when to use it and the reasons for doing so.
“All children are good”
“All children are good”. This is the first sentence that I advise you to learn by heart and always have it ready on the tip of your tongue, ready to repeat it as a mantra to anyone you cross with or to your children.
Try it in front of the mirror, with the best of your smiles. With the sweet smile for the first time, with the serious one for the second time and with that wolfish smile that shows all the teeth in case you have to repeat it three times.
Surely you already know the reason. It is none other than the damn mania of walking asking children if "they have been good" or worse yet, tell them that "if you have not been good, the Kings will not bring you anything" or that they will bring them carbon (sweet or not) .
Let's stop the Christmas emotional blackmail
I do not say that they do it with bad intention, but it is unbearable, heavy and quite unpleasant that anyone with whom you cross, even if he does not know you at all, is considered entitled to threaten a small child with whom he will run out of gifts or the Kings will bring coal if he is not submissive or does not study at school. Must stop Christmas emotional blackmail.
If your family is Christian in any way let anyone tell your children that the Child Jesus will be sad if they misbehave. If the child really believes in the Child Jesus I can think of nothing more cruel than to tell him that barbarity if he is a bit unruly. Given that, you know that the Child Jesus loves all children and knows that they need to play.
You cannot allow anyone to lie to your children, much less make them think that normal and natural behaviors in children make them "bad." Nor can you allow them to make them emotional blackmail or that you become accomplices for looking good with any adult. The most important person in the world is your son and with him if you must be honest and defend him.
The children are good. Everybody. They are good if they have tantrums. They are good if they don't do their homework. Children are good if they are messy, if they don't eat lentils, if they get nervous and if they get bored in the supermarket queue.
Remember it and repeat it, especially if your children listen to you, they will not believe all the lies that adults tell them or they will be affected by blackmail, comparisons and threats.
A Christmas purpose: set limits to emotional blackmail
For a false idea of education you may have allowed in the past to judge or label or get into your privacy or yours. A good Christmas purpose is this, make clear your limits to others and assertively explain if they are hard to understand. Gifts, meals, concepts, beliefs and Christmas customs can cause tensions.
There is not always possible agreement, but you have the right to have your decisions respected as parents. And one of the ones that is important defending is emotional education of your children and the decision not to educate them with blackmail or labels, or during Christmas or the rest of the year.
With this first of my christmas tips Maybe you can spend a Merry Christmas. Remember it “All children are good”. What are not always good are adults, and of course, even good ones do bad things.
I promise you more Christmas tips The next few days to defend you from the common places, the unbearable relatives, the miserable ladies, the noises, the traffic jams, the eaters and the unbridled consumerism that can annoy the parties if you want to continue educating your children respectfully at Christmas.
