THE FEELINGS OF A MOTHER BEFORE GOING BACK TO SCHOOL

The return to school is close, and although the children sometimes have a long summer and for the parents it is a puzzle to fit the work schedules with the school holidays, it is also frequent that at these dates we feel melancholy or sorrow at the beginning of course.

Separating ourselves from our children after such a long time enjoying with family is not easy, but if our children also start school for the first time, the feelings of anguish and doubt that we can experience can be remarkable. In a few days my middle daughter will start school for the first time, and Today I want to share how I feel…

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A shared publication of Maternity ✨Silvia (@silviadj) on 4 Aug, 2018 at 1:40 PDT

"My girl, soon you will start school for the first time and there are so many things that I feel and that I want to tell you, that I don't know where to start. It seems that it was yesterday when I held you against my chest and when your leisurely breathing on me accompanied our sleeplessness, breastfeeding and cramping nights.

Seems like yesterday when you began to sketch your first toothless smiles and to pronounce your first words that, although unintelligible to many, meant everything to me.

In Babies and more "When did you grow up so much, baby?"

Have been three years of union, parenting at home and of such a brutal connection that it's hard to loose ties. It is difficult to prepare your backpack, your baby and everything you will need to start the "older school" without feeling a chest pressure difficult to describe.

Your waking up will be left without hurry and our morning conversations about your bed, deciding how we were going to plan the day together and ending with a dose of tickles and gnats.

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A shared publication of Maternity ✨Silvia (@silviadj) on 24 Mar, 2016 at 12:26 PDT

Now, my little one, I will have to say goodbye to you at the door of the school and leave you there for hours; learning, enjoying, having fun ... Because I have no doubt that you will, but I will be so empty without your presence ...

It is common these days to hear other families talk about going back to school. Many want classes to start now and there are those who see the beginning as a liberation. Any opinion is respectable, but as the day approaches, personally more I have trouble talking about it without my voice breaking.

"Having not been to daycare takes too much time with you. You'll see how good it is to start school and take off a little from you!" - people tell me convinced.

And deep down I do not doubt it, because if there is something you like it is to learn and enjoy the experiences, and I know that in school you will do it. But alas see how it hurts! How it hurts not to be able to speak freely without looking at you strangely or without a stranger, relative or friend, telling you without any tact:

"Do not be exaggerated, so much care is not good!"
"With three years it is time for school to start! The majority are with four months in daycare!" - exclaim as if that would comfort you.

How difficult it is to go against the tide in this of the beginning of the academic year! When it seems that the socially acceptable thing is to show the unbridled desire for classes to begin and let go right and left of that of "BLESSED SCHOOL!"

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A shared publication of Maternity ✨Silvia (@silviadj) on Aug 27, 2016 at 4:44 p.m. PDT

But you know what, my girl? I'm going to confess something: Mom is afraid. Very afraid ... I do not fear adaptation, because I know that by your character you will fit perfectly and that you will have a great time with your classmates and teachers.

I fear your "new life" make you forget the special and wonderful moments we have lived together. I fear that the grueling routines will transform us and leave us no time for those early and unhurried kisses. And I fear that moment when you say goodbye with the little hand as you walk away smiling with your backpack on your back.

In Babies and more, well, not all parents jump with joy when they return to school because that precise moment will make me realize that there is no turning back, that you are growing and that one stage closes to give way to another in which you will enjoy an independence without me.

But I can assure you that although at the beginning it costs me a world, I will always be here for and for you. I will hold your hand tightly and together we will face this beginning of the course with a smile, that although I hide tears, will show the pride so great that it causes me to see you grow and overcome stages.

Be happy, my girl, and enjoy your first year in the "college of elders". Mom will wait for you at the exit with open arms, expectant heart and All the kisses saved that I will not be able to give you during the day.

Happy start of the course, my little girl! ... And please, don't grow up so fast ...