Adolescence is an especially relevant stage when it comes to sexual matters. Although at this age the usual thing is that our children already have a general knowledge about sex, it is normal that they want to know more and look for information to satisfy their curiosity.
Parents we must be by your side in this very important stage of development, answering your questions naturally and making sure that they have clear concepts before starting sexual intercourse.
In this sense, the psychologist Pilar Conde, a sexuality specialist and technical director of the Origen clinics, considers the following issues to be very important with our children:
Porn and sex are not the same
According to a recently published report, pornography is getting closer to minors and more often than we think. Not surprisingly, statistics speak of the fact that 90% of boys and 70% of girls between 13 and 14 years of age have seen pornography at least once in the last year, and one in three does so more regularly .
And it is that uncontrolled access to new technologies causes many children to end up watching porn through the Internet before having started in sexual relations, which can generate a completely unreal picture of what couple sex means.
In Babies and more 'Ex Education': what our teenage children can learn about sex by watching this Netflix series"Our teenagers should know that porn does not reflect real sex, and even a large part of this type of content shows gender stereotypes and false expectations that are not met in real life "- explains Pilar.
That is why it is important, not only to control what our children see on the Internet, but to discuss this issue with them. Because we like it or not, it is likely that sooner or later they will have access to prognostic content, but they will understand it differently if we manage to convey accurate and realistic information about sexuality.
The importance of consent and respect
Respect for others, as a whole, is one of the basic pillars of education that we must give our children from the cradle. Through our good daily example, they will learn from an early age the importance of being tolerant, empathic and respectful of those around them.
But Pilar insists on the importance of talking carefully with our teenage children about respect and consent in sexual relations, something that they must keep in mind before starting them.
"Teens need to know that sex is not alone and only penetration, but is based on a relationship of communication, respect and consent by both parties. Therefore, it is essential to teach them the importance of a respectful sexual practice and enjoyment of the parties involved. "
Communication as the basis of a healthy relationship
And in line with the above, adolescents must take into account the importance of communicate openly with your sexual partnersWell, we are all different and we have different needs, so sincere communication is key to a healthy relationship.
"Young people should understand that if they do not communicate with their partner or do not take into account their feelings and needs, they can do a lot of harm through sex. We must not take anything for granted when we start a new sexual relationshipWell, we are all different. Hence the importance of talking and being honest with each other "- emphasizes Pilar.
In Babies and more A love break in adolescence can leave a mark: how to help your son or daughter overcome itEmpower our daughters
Since they are young we should encourage our daughters to be what they want, respect their decisions, and run away from gender stereotypes. But despite being fully aware of this issue and having empowered our daughters since childhood, adolescence is an especially vulnerable stage, and some young people may show insecurities that end up affecting their first sexual relations.
In Babies and more These are the main physical changes children experience before and during adolescenceTherefore, the expert insists on the importance of empower our teenagers at this important stage of life, so that they can love and respect themselves, and know how to curb the macho attitudes that still prevail in society. And if we have male children, we also have an important mission, to educate them since childhood in respect and equality between both genders.
The importance of safe sex
And finally, a basic norm for the health of our children and their partners: Inform them about the practice of safe sex.
For this, it is essential that before starting sex, it is very clear that there may be a risk of unwanted pregnancy and of contracting sexually transmitted diseases if contraceptive methods are not used. And this can happen regardless of the type of relationships they are going to have, whether they are purely sexual or romantic.
Photos | iStock, Pixabay
Acknowledgments | Pilar Conde, Origin Clinics
