The other day a study came out that stated that the presence of the couple in childbirth could make the mother feel more pain in childbirth. As a father and a couple I will take the witness and leave my little grain of sand around here to avoid possible suffering. Here are some tips for parents, seven things you can't do in the delivery room.
Once the time of delivery arrives, everything is nerves and few are able to remain cold before the end of nine months of waiting. Finally you will meet your son, that's it, it's the end of the road.
And it is those nerves that can play us very bad past, making us not live up to the circumstances, at the height of what our partner expects of us.
You're not John Ford, so watch what you do with the camera
Having a video or photo memory of your child's birth is wonderful, but in this movie you are not the director, taking a close-up of your partner's face while she is having a contraction can be for a Goya at best photography, but I don't think she shares your emotion for showing "suffering in the rough state" so it is best to stay somewhere where you don't bother and can continue to support your partner.
Disregard the labor of your partner's birth
That your mother almost had you and your sister in the taxi, or that your grandmother gave birth at home with a neighbor is no reason to believe that giving birth is like sewing and singing. That your mother and your grandmother did not tell you that they were probably very afraid and that the pain went through them with each contraction, does not mean that it had not happened to them, but that they probably did not consider it convenient to share that information with you.
It will be a natural process and we will have been doing it for millions of years, but that does not imply that it hurts now less than before or that you try to compare the pain and discomfort of that time that gave you colic with what your wife is going through now. Really, this is not a competition of those who endure the pain better, this is a birth and we are at something else.
That the cafeteria waiter knows you better than the midwife
The time between we decided to go to the hospital and the time to give birth can be very long, I understand that one may need to go out to smoke a cigar (although he should have already left it), or have coffee, eat something, etc. But there is no justification for spending your time in the cafeteria or in the vicinity of motherhood looking for a place to smoke. It is not a good idea for your partner to spend dilating in a room (moments that can become eternal) alone and much less if he is alone with your mother. In those moments it is best to have someone who loves her and is calm by her side.
Avoid being the queen of the party
Ok, party has little, but surely you have understood me. We know he is nervous and almost as anxious as she is to see your child's face. This can make certain people tend to hoard the eyes of the environment and the attention of anyone who crosses your path. And it is that the nerves can play a trick on those moments causing us to put our partner and true protagonist in a horrific situation. Remember, today the protagonist of the story is her.
Believe to be who you are not
You will not be the first, nor will you be the last to be impressed in a birth. It's true, we are men and men have to be there, at the foot of the canyon regardless of what happens around us, we don't get nervous, we don't get a little dizzy, or we ... doctor, I think I'm getting dizzy.
A birth impresses and as much as you like gore films, this is reality and it is your partner who is giving birth, there is blood, there are people moving from one side to another, there are screams, sweat and pain. If you can not stand it, nothing happens, you do not have to do it, but what you have to do is not become another problem, so either do not go to the parlor or if you are already inside, put yourself in a corner and wait for everything to happen .
There they tell the story of the father who passed out and did not attend until the baby was in his mother's arms. Now, of course, it was going to be an incredible story to tell.
Forget that those first moments are for the mother and the son
They have been together for nine months, one inside the other, but they still don't know each other. That the baby recognizes and feels his mother is something of vital importance to him, much more than anything else (except extreme cases, of course). Therefore, wait until you have your child in arms that she has had, that they have met. You have every right to enjoy your child, but this is only an instant in life that awaits you all.
Get angry at their reactions
There are women who at the time of delivery and even with the onset of the first contractions become the dark version of themselves, blows, insults, accusations is not something that is counted, but it is not so rare either. Put yourself in his place, that a baby of about three kilos try to make his way through you is reason enough to get the most animal part inside. Do not worry, once the baby is out, your partner will also be the same as before (or at least a very similar version)
What other things bothered you about your partner in childbirth?
