Constance Hall She is a woman blogger, mother, with almost 500 thousand followers on Facebook, who is giving a lot to talk to explain how she was breastfeeding her two twins.
We are many who try to explain that breastfeeding is normal and natural, and that it is desirable when you have a baby because it is what causes it to develop in a normal way. But breastfeeding does not always go as a mother expects, and sometimes it can be very hard, to the point of ending up like her: "Crying and bleeding from the cracks while they sucked causing me horrible agony".
The illusion that turned out to be a problem
As she explained on social networks, she was very excited to breastfeed her babies, for everything she had heard about it and for the moment she would live with her babies, and she thought it would be special. But when he started breastfeeding he was greatly disappointed to see that the pain was terrible, it had cracks, it was bleeding and they were still sucking, doing more and more damage.
Then he added that not all babies are born knowing how to breastfeed and that some have to be taught, in what is a procedure "hard and frustrating". Then he decided to take out milk, and lived it as another problem. Three of his babies were born premature and he had to do so many times that he now has a rule: if he has to get milk, then it goes directly to the formula, why "nothing worth that ordeal".
And the link with your children?
She wanted to breastfeed her twins because with the others it had not been possible, and she wanted to live that special relationship, that bond that they say is created. However, when his children weaned at six months of age he realized that I was beginning to have a better relationship with them and their other children, all thanks to artificial milk.
That is why he asked all his followers, whom he calls Queens, so that they always feel capable and powerful, that they never feel bad about not being able to breastfeed:
Queens do not fail. Some continue, some change their minds, some never wanted and some had no choice. But none of them failed. Is the baby feeding? Well, that Queen has triumphed.
A message of thanks for when there is no other option
I will not criticize Hall because I think it is a very grateful message for all mothers who have really had problems with breastfeeding, to the point of feeling bad, perhaps failed, and hurt. Deserve all respect, as we said recently, as any mother deserves, feed her baby as she feeds.
But that does not mean that some improvable affirmations can be extracted from his speech, or at least things to be taken into account by other mothers. Except for a few cases, all babies know how to breastfeed. The problem is that sometimes separations are carried out at birth, manipulations and other actions that confuse the baby and causes a bad grip. That bad grip on the chest produces pain, cracks, and can be unbearable and disabling if nobody does anything to fix it.
That is, if the mother continues to breastfeed the baby without remedy, she will come to the point of crying, suffering, hating to breastfeed and end up leaving it for both her and her baby, since a poorly breastfed baby receives little food and ends up crying too.
That is why a few years ago we gave a piece of advice that we still consider very valuable: for first-time parents, but especially for future mothers, go to a breastfeeding support group. People go when they have problems, but knowing the problems beforehand can be the difference between take action on time or take them when it's too late.
A mother who has cried, desperate, who has a baby that does not stop crying ... a mother who has bled, who has cracks, who can't stand hearing him cry because she knows she is going to have to breastfeed again ... a mother in that situation, You can hardly solve the problem because it is not usually easy, not fast. It requires patience (even more) and at that point what you are looking for is a quick and definitive solution.
That, and continue fighting for more respectful protocols in hospitals so that babies are not separated from their mothers. That, and keep fighting to have better trained professionals who help mothers to breastfeed. That, and stop overwhelming women who do not breastfeed, or do not get it. Because all this support network must be to help the one who wants to breastfeed, and not to criticize the one who did not want or could not.
