Since one becomes a father one of the greatest concerns, if not the greatest, is to try to raise and educate their children in the best possible way.
In that search many parents and many mothers are dedicated to reading, researching, inquiring and asking to learn about different options or trends in parenting, news in terms of health and nutrition, information about emotional intelligence, etc.
This concern causes many parents to carry out a democratic and respectful parenting style, different from the more authoritarian style that was carried out a few decades ago and still alive in those current parents who educate their children in a way similar to how they were educated.
This coexistence of different styles means that at the moment a dialogue about children begins, someone usually ends up arguing:This has been done a lifetime and nothing has happened to us”.
If we add to this that for some (strange) reason people love to give their opinion about what parents would have to do with their children and that parents live in a constant state of alertness and with the detector of “is telling me I do it wrong ”on, the debate is served.
In any case this entry is not to talk about the discussions, but to focus on the phrase in question.
This phrase has many nuances and according to what could be a valid argument, but there are some issues for which it could be a hasty and unsuccessful conclusion.
Hit the children
Luckily for children it is less and less socially accepted to slap them. Many parents are educating their children trying to avoid these violent and humiliating acts by promoting good behaviors and the responsibility of the little ones through dialogue, empathy, connection with the child and trying to see the consequences of their own. acts
Many people, on the other hand, think that we have all been hit once and that "here we are, nothing has happened to us".
If "nothing has happened to us" they mean that we are not dead, all agree, if they refer to the fact that we are not admitted to a psychiatric hospital, I also agree, however I cannot say that I would be the same person if there were not Received those cheeks. Every time a child receives a cheek His personality is close to what his parents want him to be away from who he really is.
Give them food before six months
Have we ever had to say "no" to the intention of a grandfather or acquaintance to give our children to try some food that according to the latest indications is not recommended at what age.
Ice cream, for example, is not a meal that a 4 or 5 month old child should try, no matter how funny it is. There is also no reason to give orange juice with 3 months, although I understand that it was done in the past.
So I could have a good time to show that Current recommendations include offering food to children from 6 months.
Our mothers made it different because then it became different. Not that it was right or wrong, it's that it was done that way. Now it is recommended to do otherwise and that is why although “it has been done like this all our lives and nothing has happened to us”, some of us prefer to follow the current indications, because many are likely to have nothing, but many others do (curiously, these do not usually say that "it has been done all my life like this and I was diagnosed with an allergy").
By 25 years the guidelines will have changed based on new studies and we will have to understand that things change and are not done as is done now.
Sleep with children
You already know that I am a strong advocate of colecho, because I like it and because in my house we all sleep better in this way, but I have always tried to avoid saying that “all life has been done” because although it is true that most of us have slept sometime with our parents and nothing has happened to us, everyone must choose where to sleep and where to put their children to sleep (although I do not rule out that if one day they touch my nose a lot I end up pulling this sentence).
On this same subject we can speak from the other side: "We have all slept in the cradle and nothing has happened to us." Many things can be argued about it, as many children sleep happily in their cribs every night, but many others sleep with a higher cortisol level than when they are with their parents (cortisol = stress hormone).
If a baby cries when he is alone in his crib and calms down when he is with his mother is showing that sleeping with mom's safety and warmth is a necessity for him.
These are three of the things that have been done throughout life and for which "nothing has happened to us." Tomorrow I bring you another three.
Photos | Flickr (surlygirl), Flickr (jencu)
In Babies and more | Read books or follow the instinct ?, The minister of education against physical punishment, To be good parents there are things that can not be missing
