When, recently, I explained some of the things I let my son do, the norms we agreed to, always within something that seems very important to me, such as having the limits clear, some of our readers have asked me to explain the experience from breastfeed more than six years.
"Long breastfeeding"
Now, the truth is that nothing special is that of "prolonged breastfeeding", or rare. In my vital experience I have met families who have breastfed children five, six or seven years, wonderfully healthy physically and emotionally. I understand that they may be a minority, but for me, in the end, it is common among my friends, but I understand that it is not usual in our society. And that's why this post.
That is why I think it can help our readers to tell you about my personal experience with breastfeeding, both for those who are amazed at a “prolonged” breastfeeding and for those who doubt whether they should wean even if they do not want to.
My beginnings with breastfeeding
My initial breastfeeding was a real torture, especially psychologically. My pregnancy was, in the end, risky, and I was fearing for the life of my son. My birth was traumatic, and today I am sure that provoking it was not well taken. Perhaps, despite that, the unnecessary separation in the hospital, the stay and the beginning of breastfeeding were the most painful, leading me to provoke a situation that could be defined as depression or, in my opinion, today with a lot of personal work and study, posttraumatic stress
Breastfeeding was not, before birth, as vital to me as it would later be. But getting connected became a healing thing, which reinforced me a lot. However, I did not consider prolonged breastfeeding beyond the year. I loved the feelings of breastfeeding, the union with my son, peace and unease, the breastfeeding dream, the emotion of empowerment. Everything opened my mind and body to a way of feeling like a new and very instinctive woman that I didn't reject.
There were difficult times that first year, even after that time, of two months, until exclusive breastfeeding. Repeating mastitis and bites were problems that, with the help of a Milk League consultant, Lavinia Belli, I managed to overcome.
But the year was approaching and, although she maintained breastfeeding once very complicated, she really did not want to wean in spite of enormous environmental pressures.
My discovery of breastfeeding without premature weaning
I remember perfectly a meeting of the League of Milk, in which that advisor explained to us that she was still breastfeeding her four-year-old son. I understood that a premature weaning if my son did not want it, neither did I.
It is that until that moment it had not occurred to me that I could breastfeed until the child wanted to, and I, with my spirit of researcher in History and Anthropology, began to learn.
I discovered data on the natural age of weaning and felt very safe.
I began to search through my books of the race. I arrived at Desmond Morris and Kate Dettwyler. And I felt safe, even, no longer the instinctive, but also the scientific, of what I wanted: I would not wean by conventions, I would listen to myself and my son. The World Health Organization recommended at least two years of breastfeeding and the Spanish Association of Pediatrics explained that natural human weaning occurs between two and a half years and seven. My instinct was not madness, I could breastfeed without fear everything I wanted, and I didn't want to wean for that moment.
Then, at a Fedalma congress, I was able to meet Rosa Jové, Carlos González and Rosa Sorribas and many mothers who were breastfeeding for more than two years, and I no longer felt alone anymore.
Of course, if I had asked the body to wean after two years of breastfeeding, I would have reconsidered my premises, but it never happened. On the contrary, the crisis of the two years, the tantrums, the discovery of the self with its oppressive approach and its going crazy were simple thanks to the chest.
Breastfeed more than one, more than two, more than three years
Moms who ask me about breastfeeding more than a year They usually have some common questions. The one that worries the most is the night lactation, then, it is logical, the desire to sleep all night is strong and the women get tired.
My experience, personal and by studies, is that childhood sleep is an evolutionary process and nighttime awakenings do not depend on breastfeeding. However, of course, a mother who collects and breastfeeds is more aware of this, but, sleeping with the child the frequency and intensity of our awakening decreases.
I could not say how many times my son woke up when he was a baby, but after two and a half years the shots were gradually reduced and at three he took to fall asleep and wake up in addition to once or twice at night. During the day we could agree on the shots with explanations and I felt nothing overwhelmed, especially since, when I returned from work, being able to breastfeed him was a wonderful moment for both of us.
My son is a child who, since he was a child, has great verbal development and great empathy, and that increased when he turned three. The pressure of the environment, curiously, diminished over time, and I felt very sure of what I was doing. I didn't want to wean and was convinced to do the right thing for us.
The beautiful experience of breastfeeding in childhood
In childhood from the age of three, breastfeeding, day and night, it becomes something especially nice. The child is able to express their emotions and feelings, and recognizes breastfeeding as a moment and a special area of recollection and communication.
Understands the limits that each mother wants to breastfeed, he enjoys talking and loving in those moments, he feels safe and welcome, he is even able to express that it makes him connect with us and with the sensation of the protected baby, he knows that the chest gives him comfort and calms the physical and emotional pain in The difficult adventure of growing up. And it makes them feel, now that they know how to explain it, that their mother does not deny them a natural instinct that makes them happy.
After four years the night awakenings disappeared and the desire to breastfeed was something emotional, beautiful, peaceful, communicative, nothing overwhelming, and was gradually decreasing until milk stopped flowing due to low demand. Even when there was no milk, sometimes three or four moments in each week, the child asked for that special and comforting contact, and I never denied it, because I felt very comfortable and also safe to continue respecting his mammalian instinct It weakens very slowly.
My breastfeeding has been especially prolonged according to the parameters of our culture, but not according to the natural in the human race or according to other cultures, such as that of Mongolia, for example.
I have breastfed more than six years
I do not intend to encourage anyone to do something they do not want, it is simply a testimony of the life of a normal mother, which I hope will help other families to make their decisions freely.
I have breastfed more than six years, and I assure you that my son is a healthy and happy person, I do not know if because of it, but it certainly has not been despite prolonged, natural and satisfactory breastfeeding. If you want to give your child what is called “prolonged breastfeeding,” fear nothing, it is natural.
